After a week or more of sleeping really well, I suddenly had another terrible night of sleep last night. I had so much nervousness and anxiety that I couldn't even get to the point of feeling tired. Plus, I had tons of pressure in my pelvis, which made me need to use the restroom every 20-30 minutes, constant back pain, some mild nausea, and intermittent contractions. I figured I was in the early stages of labor, but despite all that, I finally slept a couple of hours in the wee morning hours.
Even though I was a little nauseous, I was hungry, so I forced myself to have a bowl of cereal and big glass of water when I woke up. Then I took a warm bath to try to relax, but it didn't help much. I finally asked Russ for a blessing, and when he came up, I just lost all control of my emotions. He had me say a prayer, which helped me realize that I was just emotionally and physically spent and that I needed to be able to sleep. I wanted to be rested so that I could be ready for what is supposed to be a very joyous occasion - the birth of my son. After the blessing, I went to bed and was able to take a couple of short naps, which helped a lot. I finally worked up a real appetite, and Russ went to get some rolled tacos for me. I spent most of the day in bed resting, but I did have to get up for a doctor appointment in the afternoon.
The doctor said I was 4cm dilated and 60-70% effaced, but most importantly, that he was still in a head down position. After she checked me, she asked what I wanted to do, and I said I was ready to be induced. Even though I wanted to let him come on his own, I realized that my anxiety and lack of sleep was reason enough to go ahead and schedule an induction. I'm sure it's not good for either of us when I'm in such an emotional and physical state.
So, we are all systems go for Saturday, May 15th at 11AM (unless he decides he's ready earlier). I honestly felt today that he was pretty much on his way, anyway, so I know everything will be fine and that this is best for both of us at this point.
When I was in elementary school, I took one of those tests where the first direction is to read all the directions before starting the assignment, and the last direction is not to do the assignment at all. Yes, I was one of the knuckleheads who merrily went about answering all the questions, thinking I was so smart... that is, until I got to the end and realized I'd been had.
Well, that established something about me that it seems will forever be... I am not good at following directions. Yes, I read them, but somehow I don't follow them very precisely. Take cooking. How many times have I just dumped ingredients in the main bowl when I was supposed to mix them separately first? Lots.
So it is with sewing, too, and as a result, I have a love/hate relationship with my seam ripper. Oh seam ripper, what would I do without you? Yet, if I never saw you again, it would be too soon! I'm telling you, it's downright embarrassing. Apparently it doesn't matter how many times I've sewn the right side of one piece of fabric to the wrong side of another piece of fabric, I will never get in the habit of double checking before I sew the first stitch... even after that time I was making a cute little fairy costume and after sewing both sleeves, realized to my horror that one was going out of the garment and one was going into it, like it was made for some deformed little creature. It's madness! I guess I'm just convinced I know what I'm doing, and my ego ain't gonna let that change.
Even so, after much seam ripping, folding the other way, moving the bias tape to the correct edge of the fabric, etc., I managed to pull off a really cute little man suit! I dare say, he's going to look smashing!
Okay, yeah, I have some details to finish... buttons, snaps, and a little bow tie... but I was too excited to wait to unveil my little creation to you!
Don't expect a birth announcement just yet! When the doctor checked me on Friday, she said the baby's head was still down and that he was unlikely to go breech again at this point. I asked her if she still recommended the induction, and she said she didn't feel strongly one way or the other and that it would be up to me. After much consideration, including many irrational fears that I suspect some other expectant moms have had before me, I decided to wait a little longer to see if he will decide to come on his own soon. The doctor will check him again on Thursday, and then I'll decide what to do next at that point. Nothing like waiting day after day in anticipation... not knowing when it will happen is the hard part. The good news is that now that he's in the correct position, I can breathe and sleep more easily. I'm going to try to get all the rest I can while I have the chance...